Here's my response to a WONDERFUL, AMAZING article by the Rev. Emily C. Heath of the Bilerico Project. It's a MUST READ!!! With caps and exclamation ponts fully deserved! :-)
As RuPaul says, if you can't love yourself, how the hell you gonna love someone else?
Also, if you can't learn to love yourself at whatever size, no amount of weight loss is going to be a miracle cure for the self hate.
I have lived with self hate for years. I'm straight, so that was one battle I didn't have to fight. (It's ridiculous that sexual orientation has to be a battle for anybody.) But I have struggled with mental illness for as long as I can remember, and I am physically handicapped after an accident 7 years ago that left me with a spinal cord injury. At 44 I am incontinent of urine and have to wear Depends. I walk with a cane. My kidneys were injured and I do have to have dialysis although I am luckier than a lot of people as the kidneys still do function to a degree. Plus I am morbidly obese. Admissibly this is muchly my own fault as after the accident I became severely depressed and just didn't care about anything, particularly myself. I sat around watching TV and eating and wishing I'd die. At this point it is hard to lose the weight that I put on because I cannot exercise strenuously. I have radically changed my eating habits but I cannot live on Slim Fast (bleah!) So I am still morbidly obese.
Here's a shocker for the "so concerned about your health" crowd--especially those that have the audacity to lecture someone they really don't even know! Fat people--get ready for it--KNOW THEY'RE FAT! We might even know that our weight is in the unhealthy range. We don't need to hear it from you.
I always struggled with my weight. I was bulimic in my teens. If anyone ever told me that I would be morbidly obese I would have killed myself, because I did not have any love for myself, even when I was tiny--110 pounds--and still thought I was fat.
I would give a lot to lose 100 or more pounds, but I no longer say I would give anything. Because there are things in this world a lot more important than being skinny. Such as being alive and being with people who love you and are really there for you no matter your size.
You are a great writer, Emily. Thank you for making my day today.
Comments